my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
