so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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