i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
