you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just googled if crying burns calories
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
