Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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