It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
