'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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