I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
