Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
