He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Damn victory sex feels great
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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