he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
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