they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
