How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize