Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
