Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
