I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
