There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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