quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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