I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i just google imaged poop.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
