So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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