the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
