if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
