Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
