i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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