So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
