I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
