Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
