i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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