woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize