Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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