Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
