What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
