Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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