How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
