i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
