I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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