Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
