on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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