I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
