whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
