if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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