O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
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