i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
