I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize