it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
