dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize