I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
