He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
