she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
