what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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