is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
